Coaching is Choosing the Red Pill

I recently rewatched the classic Matrix movie. At one point, the “Judas character” Cypher says to Neo, “I know what you’re asking yourself. I’ve been asking it since I came here. Why, oh why didn’t I take the BLUE pill!?”

Morpheus had given Neo a choice between taking either a “red pill” that exposes an unpalatable reality or taking a “blue pill” to stay in dreamy blindness.

The reasons churches call us to walk alongside their teams and leaders vary widely. But at some point in the walk, there are moments of truth. Sometimes it’s an uncomfortable truth.

When we come into a church that’s used to “Good Enough,” at some point, they’ll begin to feel the way Cypher did. “Can’t we just go back to the easy way?”

But because we serve as mirrors, we’re going to offer you the truth on the road to freedom and becoming the best version of yourself.

I just watched this 3-minute excerpt from a TED talk on the idea of coaching. Surgeon Atul Gawande presented two opposing thoughts of how people do what they do:

1. You learn (school, lessons, etc.) and then you find your way
2. You’re never done learning, so you have people help you on your way

He reveals a common myth: “Expertise means not needing to be coached.” That myth is trouble because “you don’t recognize the issues standing in your way or if you do recognize them, you don’t know how to fix them.”

“The result is that you stop improving.” We’re called to increase the value of what we’re given to manage, according to Matthew 25. So not improving is a problem.

This is why we coach leaders and teams: To make sure that Jesus is glorified because you are bearing much fruit. (John 15:8)

What does taking the red pill look like?

Honest Assessment
Whether we’re deep in conversation, coaching at a rehearsal, giving feedback on a service, or meeting with the whole team, being your outside eyes and ears brings a whole new level of awareness. As coaches, “we provide a more accurate view of reality.”

It’s the kindest thing anyone will ever do for you. You might hate it at the moment, but in time it will “yield the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:11)

And by the way, it doesn’t matter at all where you are today. The question is, where are you going, where are you called to end up.

Intentional Growth
We focus on the fundamentals. When we begin a relationship with a church, we instinctively ask the question, “What would this team or leader look like if they were the healthiest, best version of themselves?”

After identifying some things standing in the way of being where you want to be, we may ask, “What goal would you like to set about this issue?”

But we don’t stop there. I mean, you’re not usually unaware of the things you’d like to improve. But for those things that you CAN see, it can be challenging to have both the strategy and the energy to make those changes.

That’s why we talk about coaching in terms of “walking alongside” leaders. We’ll both push you beyond where you’d go AND provide the encouragement and confidence you may lack in doing so.

Staying Power to Thrive
Why did we set our sites on “eradicating isolation and burnout”? Because nothing breaks our hearts like hearing of leaders and team members struggling on their own and eventually walking away.

If you’ve ever felt like giving up, you’ve needed a coach. If your worship leader has ever been unresponsive to your feedback, he or she has needed a coach. If your team has stopped listening to your direction, they’ve needed a coach.

In my (gulp) 30th year as a worship leader, I’m growing and hungry as ever because I’ve had coaches and mentors speaking into my life. My goal and Ad Lib’s goal is that each of you thrives every single day that the LORD has counted out for you.

You can feel much more confident and be more effective by getting a coach with Ad Lib. It’s a super-simple, 3-step process:

1. Schedule a free 30-minute coaching call by clicking here
2. Create a coaching plan with your coach’s help
3. Agree to the plan and get started

-Dave